MY services
Grief Counselling
Grief can feel nothing like people expect it to. It can be messy, physical, confusing, delayed, numb, overwhelming or strangely quiet. You might be grieving a person, a relationship, a version of yourself, lost time, health, identity or the life you thought you would have. And that’s where grief counselling can help.
I offer a person-centred space where grief does not need to be explained away, rushed or turned into a “process” to complete. Together we can make space for the sadness, anger, relief, guilt, shutdown, sensory overwhelm, exhaustion or disorientation that can come with loss. Sometimes people want to talk. Sometimes they need help understanding what is happening in their body and nervous system first.
My Approach to Grief Counselling
I work gently and at your pace. I do not believe grief has a timeline or a “right” way to look. Some people arrive wanting to speak about the person they have lost. Others come because they feel stuck, emotionally numb, anxious, disconnected or unable to function months or years after a loss.
Grief Counselling can offer somewhere to bring all of that honestly and without expectation or judgement.
My approach is influenced by the work of David Kessler, Julia Samuel and Dr Mary Frances O’Connor, alongside the relational values of person centred therapy. I am also informed by a neuro-affirming lens that recognises grief and nervous systems are deeply connected.
Grief counselling might involve:
talking through the loss itself
understanding how grief is showing up in your body
making sense of anger, guilt or relief
exploring identity changes after loss
finding ways to feel safer and more regulated
supporting executive functioning during grief
giving space to complicated or disenfranchised grief
helping you stay connected to the person you have lost in ways that feel meaningful to you
You do not have to “move on” to deserve support.
Neurodivergence and Grief
For neurodivergent people, grief, and so grief counselling, does not always follow a neat or recognisable path and grief can sometimes be misunderstood. You may:
process emotions later than expected
feel grief physically rather than emotionally
experience burnout or shutdown after a loss
struggle with changes in routine, identity or safety
feel pressure to grieve “correctly”
become overwhelmed by other people’s expectations around grief
My style
I’m warm, empathetic and approachable, but I’m also direct and ask challenging questions. I pride myself on being an active listener and on taking the time to truly get to know my clients, ensuring that I remember all the details of their inner lives.
One-to-one therapy
At my private practice in the centre of Manchester, I provide a private and comfortable space for therapy sessions. It’s a lovely, welcoming environment where you can feel at ease and open up about your thoughts, feelings, and experiences.
Online therapy
In addition to face-to-face sessions, I provide online sessions and sessions over the phone. This allows you to access therapy from the comfort of your own space or when you are unable to attend in person. Whether it's through video calls or phone conversations, I am committed to providing a safe and supportive environment for your healing and growth journey.
FAQs
What type of counselling is best for grief?
There is not one single best type of grief counselling. What matters most is feeling safe, understood and not rushed. A relational and person centred approach can help because it allows grief to unfold in its own way rather than forcing you through stages or techniques before you are ready.
How long is a grief counselling session?
Sessions are usually 50 minutes. Some people come for short term support around a recent loss, while others need longer term space for more complex grief or cumulative losses.
What are the 3 C’s of grief?
Different grief models use different versions of the “3 C’s”, but they are often described as:
choosing to acknowledge grief
connecting with support
communicating honestly about your needs
In reality, grief is usually less formulaic than this. Some people need to talk, others need quiet, routine, movement or time before they can access what they feel.
Does counselling help with grief?
It can. Counselling cannot take grief away, but it can help you feel less alone in it. Many people find it helpful to have somewhere to speak honestly about thoughts and feelings they cannot share elsewhere.
What are the 5 stages of grief?
The five stages are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance, originally described by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross. Many people know them, but grief is rarely this linear in real life. You may move in and out of different emotions, or not relate to the stages at all.
Does grief ever go away?
Usually grief changes rather than disappears. Many people find they grow around the grief over time, while still carrying love, sadness or longing for the person they lost.
At what age is grief the hardest?
Grief can be hard at any age. What often matters more is the support around you, the relationship to the loss and what else is happening in your life and nervous system at the time.
What shouldn’t you do while grieving?
There is no perfect way to grieve, but many people struggle when they feel they have to hide it, rush it or cope completely alone. Trying to force yourself back to “normal” too quickly can sometimes deepen exhaustion or disconnection.
Organisations like The Good Grief Trust, Cruse Bereavement Support, Sue Ryder Bereavement Support and The Loss Foundation can be important, additional support alongside counselling.
Why does grief feel physical?
Grief is not only emotional. It can affect sleep, appetite, concentration, memory, digestion and energy levels. Many people describe heaviness in the chest, nausea, exhaustion, body pain or feeling constantly “on edge”.
Writers and researchers such as Dr Mary Frances O’Connor and Richard Gross explore how grief affects both the brain and nervous system. When someone important to us dies or leaves, the body can respond almost like a threat response. For neurodivergent people especially, grief may show up through shutdown, burnout, sensory overwhelm or physical dysregulation before it becomes emotional language.
Sometimes people think something is “wrong” with them because they are not crying, but their body may already be carrying the grief in other ways.
Can grief cause anxiety or burnout?
Yes. Grief can affect your nervous system, capacity and sense of safety. People often notice increased anxiety, difficulty coping with daily tasks, emotional overwhelm, irritability or exhaustion after a loss.
For neurodivergent clients, grief can sometimes intensify autistic burnout, ADHD overwhelm or masking fatigue. Even practical changes around loss such as routines changing, more social expectations, disrupted sleep or uncertainty can place extra pressure on the nervous system.
Counselling can help you understand what your mind and body may be trying to communicate rather than judging yourself for struggling.
Why do I feel numb after a loss?
Numbness is a very common grief response. Sometimes the brain and body protect us from feeling too much at once. You may know logically that something painful has happened but not feel emotionally connected to it yet.
Grief is not always expressed through tears. Some people become highly practical or emotionally flat after loss, especially when they have needed to survive difficult situations before. Others only begin to feel grief months or years later when life becomes safer or slower.
Numbness does not mean you did not love the person.
Can autistic people experience grief differently?
Yes. Autistic people may experience and express grief differently, although there is no single “autistic grief” experience. Some autistic people process grief internally, become more sensory overwhelmed, need more alone time or struggle with the unpredictability and social demands that follow a loss.
Others may feel emotions intensely but find it difficult to identify or communicate them. Delayed grief responses are also common.
Unfortunately, autistic grief is sometimes misunderstood by others, particularly if someone does not express emotion in expected ways. Neuro-affirming grief support means not assuming there is one correct way to mourn.
What is complicated or complex grief?
Complicated or complex grief is when grief feels persistently overwhelming, stuck or difficult to integrate over time. It can involve intense longing, guilt, anger, avoidance, numbness or difficulty reconnecting with life after a loss.
Sometimes this happens because the relationship itself was complex, the death was sudden or traumatic, or because previous grief and trauma were already unresolved.
That does not mean the person is “failing” at grief. Often it means the loss has overwhelmed the nervous system or disrupted someone’s sense of safety, identity or attachment.
Why has my grief appeared years later?
Grief is not always immediate. Some people go into survival mode after a loss and only begin to feel the impact much later. This can happen when life becomes quieter, after another loss, during burnout, or when something unexpectedly reconnects you to the person or experience.
Therese Rando writes about grief being revisited across different stages of life. A loss can feel different at 25 than it does at 40, particularly as your identity and understanding change.
Delayed grief is more common than many people realise.
How do I support a grieving neurodivergent partner or child?
Often the most helpful thing is reducing pressure and increasing safety. Try not to force emotional expression or expect grief to look a certain way. Some people need to talk, while others need quiet, routine, movement, practical support or time alone.
It can help to:
offer predictable support rather than vague offers
reduce sensory and social overwhelm where possible
avoid rushing someone to “move on”
be clear and direct in communication
allow different emotional expressions
understand that behaviour changes may be grief responses
Sometimes sitting alongside someone consistently matters more than finding the perfect words.
Is it normal to feel relief after someone dies?
Yes. Relief can exist alongside sadness, guilt or love. This is especially common after long illnesses, difficult relationships, caregiving strain or anticipatory grief.
People can feel relieved that someone is no longer suffering, or relieved that a period of stress and uncertainty has ended. Having relief does not mean the relationship did not matter.
Grief is often emotionally contradictory.
Can grief affect sensory overwhelm or executive functioning?
Absolutely. Grief takes enormous emotional and cognitive energy. Many neurodivergent people notice more difficulty with planning, memory, concentration, decision making and daily tasks after a loss.
Sensory overwhelm may also increase because the nervous system is already under strain. Things that were previously manageable can suddenly feel exhausting or impossible.
This is not laziness or failure. Grief can temporarily reduce our capacity to cope and function in the ways we are used to.
What if I do not cry when grieving?
Not everyone cries, and crying is not the measure of grief. Some people process internally, physically, intellectually or through action rather than outward emotion.
Culture, neurotype, trauma history, personality and nervous system responses can all shape how grief is expressed. Some people cry immediately. Others never do. Some only cry years later.
There is no single correct way to grieve.